Losing someone you love can be one of the hardest experiences you go through in life. It's difficult to come to terms with the loss and to understand the feelings and emotions that come along with it. It can be especially hard to cope with these feelings when you are all alone and there is nobody to turn to for comfort.
It is hardest especially on nights alone. You may have found yourself listening to the same old songs, taking the same walks, or wearing the same old clothes. What's clear is there is a line between where you started with them and where you are now without them. The things that you did before seem not only different, but somehow alien. But there is a reason for this. You are grieving.
Physical Symptoms of Grief
It's evident to us by now that our body stores traumas, thoughts, and feelings in places other than the mind. It might not be crystal clear memories as some would like to think, but the tension and relapse of sickness is something that comes along quite naturally. At times you might find yourself feeling dizzy, unable to focus, or even feeling sick to your stomach from the thought of them not being with you. This is grief.
It's hard to believe that life can keep going when you’ve lost someone so important to you. You may find yourself asking why or how can things continue to move on when you can’t. The truth is life will still go on, and eventually you will find yourself being able to take in the beauty of life again. But it will take time.
Physical symptoms of grief can include headaches, chest pain, nausea, fatigue and loss of appetite. It is important to recognize these symptoms, as they can indicate that you are struggling to process your loss and cope with the emotional pain. If you are experiencing any of these symptoms, it is important to seek help from a mental health professional.
When you've lost such a large piece of you, there is feelings of a hole between your heart and your head. You can't always put your finger on it but it's like despite this person being external to you, somehow something within you aches and feels a bit of remorse that you yourself don't understand.
When you’ve lost someone you love, it’s okay to keep loving them.
Grief is an emotion that is oftentimes misunderstood. We use terms like “grief-stricken” and “heartbroken” to describe the overwhelming sadness and pain associated with losing a loved one, but have you ever stopped to think about what it really is?
At a fundamental level, grief is not simply an emotion that we feel. It is an unconscious process of our brains and bodies trying to resolve the association of a lively creature who used to live with us. Our brains are made up of disparate clusters of neurons that have been associated with the person we loved. When they die, these neurons can still be active, meaning that we can still feel grief even though the person is gone.
For example, a person might feel grief every time they eat a certain meal, because the brain regions associated with that person become activated. The emotions associated with the person’s death may not be consciously remembered, but the neurons in the brain still remember the connection.
When we experience grief, it is important to be patient with our brains and bodies. We cannot expect the logical knowledge of the memory of their death to suddenly educate the rest of our disparate parts. We must be gentle with ourselves and give our brains and bodies time to process the emotions associated with the loss.
Grief is a complex emotion and understanding it can be difficult. It is important to remember that grief is not simply an emotion, but a process that our brains and bodies must go through in order to resolve the association of the living person. We must be patient with ourselves and understanding of our own unique grieving process.
Accepting the Loss
You may find yourself taking time to grieve, to cry, to laugh and to love. It's okay to miss them and it's okay to love them. It's okay to be sad, to be angry, and to be confused. It's okay to remember them and it's okay to talk about them.
It's okay to take your time in grieving and to take the time to heal. You don’t have to rush, you don’t have to conform, and you don’t have to forget.
There is a considerable amount of research in the area of grief and how it affects the grieving process. One area of research that may be particularly useful is the concept of “complicated grief”, which is a longer and more intense grief reaction that may be caused by numerous factors, such as the intensity of the loss, the relationship with the deceased, and the individual’s personality and coping style.
Complicated grief usually arises from the death of a loved one, where the loss has left you stuck in a state of bereavement. You may be unable to accept your loved one has gone, search for them in familiar places, experience intense longing, or even feel that life isn’t worth living.
Research has also focused on the role of unresolved issues in the grieving process, as well as the role of spirituality in helping people cope with their grief. Additionally, research has explored different types of interventions such as individual, group, and family counseling that can help people move forward with their lives after a loss. Finally, research has focused on the role of support groups in helping people cope with their grief.
If you are feeling overwhelmed by your grief, it is important to seek help from a mental health professional or support group. A therapist can help you to process your feelings and develop healthy coping strategies. Additionally, support groups can provide a safe and supportive environment in which to share your experiences and connect with others who are also struggling with grief. If you are struggling to cope with your loss, it is important to remember that you are not alone and there is help available.
When you've lost someone you love, they are still living inside you. Identifying the physical symptoms of grief and finding support will help you through it.
Grief at sea
My grief was vast, like a raging sea.
Its swells threatening to swallow me.
But I have hope now as I look ahead,
As I know I am sailing with their spirit instead.
For my memory of them is a part of their sum,
And my grief is a reminder of how much I still love them.
I can feel their presence in the wind and the sun,
And I know they will always be a part of me, even when they're gone.
My grief is vast, like a mighty sea:
But my hope is greater, and sets me free;
For I know that our bond still lives on,
And I will always carry them in my heart, where they belong.
My grief will be vast, like an endless sea:
But beyond it lies a world of hope and possibility;
A world where I can always feel their presence in my life,
A world where I can be sure that their memory will never die.